No more suffering...for now please?

It's okay to tell God you are suffering. And, it is also okay to tell God that you want him to take away your suffering. This morning I found myself crying to God about the many trials and sufferings he has brought into my life over the past few years and months. He did not back away. He stayed with me and listened to my complaints. God does not think any less or more of you when you admit that you would like to see some joy in your life rather than pain and suffering. There is always a place for suffering in our lives but, there are times when enough is enough. And, because we love God, we can trust that we can share that with him. We do not have to be afraid to admit that we want the bleeding to stop. He knows exactly how we feel. As I was praying, I was encouraged and felt like God sometimes needs to hear from us that enough is enough. He needs to know from us that we need his help. If we just try and muscle through all that life throws at us, we miss the strength, hope, and joy that only comes from Jesus.

So, if you find yourself a little fed up today, do not back away from those feelings. Pray and let God heal your wounds. If there are many, today is a chance to say to God, take them away and replace them with joy and hope. God has plans to make us new each day. Today, is a chance for God to give you hope for a future. True, we may suffer in this life, but today I recommend asking God to free some of the space in our lives that has been filled with suffering and replace it with his life and newness. Let yourself go in your time with God. He will bring restoration, healing, and finally joy.

Trusting God

Trusting God can be so challenging. It is hard to trust in something we cannot see. I don't know about you but, whenever I am facing a new, run off a cliff kind of challenge, people usually encourage me by saying, "Trust God." However, there are times when that is nearly impossible. It is like being in an empty forest, trying to find a way out in dense fog. Your eyes just cannot see what is in front of you. But, what I am learning is that trusting in God really just means saying, "I am leaving it up to you God."

If you are anything like me, you imagine the worst and secretly hope for the best. I will think about situations months in advance and create worry in my heart over things I really have no control. This is just wrong. God wants us to be present in the here and now. He wants us to give up our future to him. Trusting and saying, "take it all" is really what he is after. This is hard because we cling to things to provide us security and assurance. We are control freaks! Ok, I am a control freak. And, God wants to break us of that habit.

So, I encourage you today, if you find yourself lacking trust, open your Bible, take a look at the life of Jesus and let it go. There is no magical formula for trusting God. It happens when we spend time listening to God, hearing his truth, and opening our hearts to him. If you are struggling to do so, do not feel like you have to force it. God is amazing and will bring you peace. We just have to push ourselves to spend time with him and let his truth sink deeply into our hearts. Trusting God is a challenge but, not so much of a challenge when we soak in his presence. It is then, that all of our cares are wiped away and our burdens are lifted. Enjoy God today. He will bring the trust you are desperately trying to find.

My Thoughts on Prayer

I have started reading an amazing book on prayer, Philip Yancey's : Prayer, What Difference does it make? This book is full of tweets; so many lines worth quoting and thinking about. I have always enjoyed prayer. However, when I was younger, I think there was a lot of self-righteousness in my prayers. I would talk about how much I loved to pray, and that everyone else should pray too. I probably made a lot of people feel uncomfortable. And, when I look back, my heart was saying, "why don't you pray as much as I do, I am more holy." But, because of God's mercy and grace, I have learned that we should never judge another person's prayer life because that is judging an intimate relationship that we have no idea about. I write to encourage you that prayer is not a transaction. Prayer is how we each have an intimate relationship with God.

Why do you pray? Do you pray because you want to see things happen? Do you pray out of desperation? Do you pray because you have to in order to be a good Christian? When we look at Jesus' life, we see the perfect example of what prayer should be in our lives. In almost every story about Jesus in the Bible, he retreats in prayer. He finds strength to undergo the crucifixion in prayer. And, while he prays for several hours, his disciples fall asleep. Jesus is the perfect example of what our prayer life should look like. Yet, we are completely human, and therefore we struggle with attention in prayer, with motivation in prayer, with giving time to prayer.

If you find yourself like I did feeling like "people just don't pray enough, people don't come to our prayer meetings, or people do not pray like I do." Please be more gracious. Please invite Jesus in your heart to heal you from that attitude. Everyone has a unique relationship with God. He is developing those relationships in his time and in his purpose. Just because someone isn't showing up to your prayer meeting, or using the same language you would use to speak with God, or even interprets the Bible in a different way than you do does not mean they care less about God or have less of a relationship with him. I recommend that we spend more time with God asking him on how to encourage prayer as a relationship rather than a transaction.

Sappy but True

So, my life is a crazy mess right now, and I love it! I have no idea where I am going to be living in two weeks. I could be here in Boston or I could be living in Singapore. I could be hanging out with good friends or making new ones. I could be speaking Bostonian or I could be speaking Singlish. We just have to wait and see. But, the best part of it all is that I have Chris.

If you ask my family, I am not sentimental. If you ask Chris, I am not romantic. However, the last few months I have been realizing that Chris is more than just a husband, he is a really great man. So, I write today to tell you how important it is to stick it out with the person you love or to find someone that you can stick it out with! No matter your situation, having a spouse that loves you and loves God even more is top notch.

People like to write marriage books and give you advice on how to attain the perfect marriage. And, well, that is silly. The truth is that a marriage has moments when you look at the person and see that this really is the best pairing. It also has moments like when you are jet-lagged from a 20 hour flight and suddenly driving the car on the LEFT side of the road, when the romance has maybe left the building. But, I tell you, if you wait a moment longer it comes back.

Finding someone to love is not easy. There are too many frogs out there in the world. And despite "Boy Meets Girl" claims for singleness until marriage, I would not really appreciate Chris if I hadn't dated a few frogs! But, my advice is think of something you cannot compromise on and find that in a person. Forget looks, forget money, forget reputation because those things can be gone in moment. Never settle for a person that doesn't look at you like you are the only person in the room. I know, I'm giving dating advice, you can laugh. But, the truth is that there really isn't anything better than finding someone to love.

In 2 weeks, I will be married to Chris for 5 years. When we first got married, I was in the grocery aisle thinking, "oh dear, this is it, picking out crackers for the rest of my life?" But, now I look back and realize how lucky I am to have someone that wants to go with me to the grocery store! Never feel like its too late to find love or to appreciate it.

I really believe that God brings people together to experience love in its rarest form. And, I am so thankful that he has given Chris to me as a gift for as long as he wills it. For you reading this, I wish you that same appreciation for your spouse or drive to find someone that will love you like this. And, when you suffer the worse sadness or experience the greatest joy, they will be there holding your hand through it all.

Are you wearing your LifeVest?

Often times, we look at our current circumstances and think, "why?" We wonder why we are going through what we are in this current moment. We cannot see the plan or the purpose behind our suffering. Usually, the result is unrest, anxiety, discontentedness. We feel neglected, abandoned, left to die. If we look at the story of Exodus in the Bible, we can see the misery and distrust that has worked its way into the hearts of the followers of Moses. They feel the way we often do when things go wrong in our lives.However, today, I write to tell you great news. You see, if their suffering was not so apparent and their way out was not as far from being seen, God's power in their lives would never have been recognized.

Your suffering is the place that God chooses to show his power over all things. The situation of those in Exodus was desolate. They had no chance. But, God proved that he could control the sea and make a way for them. The same is true for you today. God can part a sea where there is no hope. He can move mountains and tear down walls of hardened hearts. Every time we think "why?" God is there ready to answer. It is in our place of greatest humility that God can show his power.

Today, if you feel discouraged, if you feel there is no way out, I ask you to wait a few minutes longer. I ask you to pray fervently for the waters to be parted and the seas to be made calm. There is always a way out with God. There is always higher ground that he wants you to stand on. The suffering will come but, you can be assured that so will God's rescue. And, his name will then be made greater than yours.

Do you read your Bible? Really?

Today, I write on encouraging you of the importance of knowing, and living God's word in the Bible. Yesterday, at church, God used a woman to speak to me about the importance of meditating daily on God's word. When we forget, or do not feel like it, or have other things to do, we are saying to God that we do not care what he has to say to us. But rather, when we read and listen to God, we find out many things. We find out about his character, about his promises to us, about our identity in him, and about knowledge and wisdom that come only from knowing him.

I tend to find myself in the camp that promotes and organic relationship with Jesus. One that is dictated by our love for him. However, after listening to this exhortation, I am convinced that we need to schedule time for reading, studying, and meditating on God's word, daily. You see, somethings need a place of honor. Our relationship with Jesus and our Father should be booked into our schedules.

If you find yourself worried about your future, or full of unrest, I say go to God's word. Spend time reading and God will speak to you. Only through his word can we learn from God. We sometimes expect him to speak in a loud booming voice, for which he sometimes does, but often his plans, purposes are hidden in his word for us to discover. We can be sure that God is with us in our process of study and he will answer us in big ways. It is in studying his word that we can become patient with him in the process of this life he has given to us.

So, I encourage you, make time for reading God's word each day. You will see that your heart has more love for others, that your brain is no longer fuzzy about decisions, and that the Holy Spirit is alive and active in your daily life. God's word has power and purpose we must not neglect it for the ordinary things this world has to offer.

I like Boston about as much as Bacon...

I ate bacon today. Yep, pork, greasy, bacon. I know. It is such a shock to you. The truth of the matter is that I missed it. I missed something that I normally despise. How is this possible? The truth is that we don't really know what we have until it is no longer there.

I have been contemplating this as I have travelled around the world to a place I am not familiar with. Suddenly, all the things that I hate about Boston have become the things I greatly miss. I miss the sights, the smells, the yells... ok the last one is a lie. But, I do love my home in Boston. For so long, I have tried to leave. I've tried to escape being a Bostonian. Yet, I kept getting pulled back in. Lured in by the pushiness, snottiness, and hard heartedness. Yet, just like bacon, I miss it. I miss the way people talk and walk. I miss the sports! I miss the TV shows! But, most of all, I miss my church.

Please, all of you people that have fainted, get up! Yes, I miss my church. The mission in Boston is so tough. We often think, its hard to share the gospel in a place dominated by Muslim or Atheist believers in countries far away, but really it is so hard to share Jesus in Boston. It's easy to get discouraged and want to up and leave. People in Boston have been burned by religion and have no place for God because they feel like he has hurt them. It's totally understandable really. But, its a hard place to plant a church. It's a hard place to fight the good fight of faith.

I write to you today to encourage you. When you feel discouraged about sharing your faith, be encouraged because God had placed you in Boston because he thinks you have the best stuff. You have what it takes. You are the Rocky Balboa of his army. Boston is a place where God wants to heal the broken and save those who have been burned. How happy I am today to realize this! How great a cause I fight!

Boston and bacon are in the same camp for me. Every taste makes me question, "why?" Why this place? But, my realization today is that I have the stuff that it takes to get the job done. And, if you find yourself wondering, why? Why Boston? Be encouraged, you are in for the fight of your lifetime. But, if you go away, you will soon be pulled back again. Boston needs you. And, even if you share and are dismissed, share again, and again because the truth prevails and Jesus will reign in Boston because he loves this place. He loves these people.